Discussing
by wekfnwekonf
Summary: Bella, Alice, Rosalie, Esme and Renesmee are discussing the Harry Potter books but unfortunately the boys over hear. Warning Harry Potter spoilers.


**Bella, Alice, Rosalie, Esme and Renesmee are discussing the Harry Potter books but unfortunately the boys over hear. Warning Deathly Hallows spoilers, lol. **

**So I was really bored and decided to write this, sorry that I removed my other story but I just had no ideas for it. **

**I don't own anything. **

**Third person.**

"So have you finished them yet?" Alice asked Nessie excitedly. She rolled her eyes at her aunt.

"Yes Aunt Alice." Alice jumped up and down clapping.

"They were brilliant! Best books I've ever read!"

"Aren't they just the best though?!" Bella walked into the room.

"What's the best?"

"The Harry Potter books!" Nessie and Alice shouted at the same time, they were getting more and more like each other every day. Scary.

"Ohhh."

Alice turned back to Nessie just as Rosalie and Esme came into the room.

"Sooo, who'd you have a thing for?"

"Alice! She's only seven!" Bella interrupted angrily. Alice shook her head and tutted.

"Yes, and _**married**_!" Everyone in the room turned back to Nessie, who raised her eyebrows.

"What?!"

"Sooo, who _**did**_ you have a thing for?" Rosalie asked, voicing what everyone else was thinking. Nessie's jaw dropped.

"I can't believe you're asking me this!"

"It was Harry wasn't it?" Bella asked with a grin.

"Mum!"

"Oh dear God, please tell me it wasn't Hermione!" Alice said in disgust.

"Aunt Alice!"

"Ron?"

"Dean?"

"Neville?"

"Dudley?"

"Will you lot shut u- Dudley, Grandma Esme?" Nessie shuddered delicately and Esme giggled, "Anyway if you must know, Malfoy. There I said it!" Everyone looked around in shock, they hadn't actually believed they'd break her.

"So what about the rest of you, I told you mine now you tell me yours!" Nessie ordered. She looked at Bella first.

"Fine! Fred."

"Ha-ha Fred dies!" Alice laughed.

"Hey!" Bella shouted, hitting her lightly on the arm. It sounded like she hit her with a stone, "If mine's so funny what about yours?!" Alice stuck her tongue out.

"Rususwumi."

"Sorry what was that Alice, we didn't quite catch it." Bella asked delightedly, she was enjoying every second of this.

"I said Ron Weasley!" Everyone burst out laughing and if Alice could have blushed she would have, "OK, Esme what about you?!"

"Do I have to tell you?" She pleaded, "You'll only laugh."

"Yes you have to tell us and yes we'll only laugh." Alice said stubbornly.

"Fine, Sirius Black." They started laughing.

"Ha-ha he dies." Everyone stopped laughing to stare at Bella.

"That was uncalled for Bella, how could you say something like that?" Alice asked in all seriousness.

"Wha, bu- you, I. Huh?" Everyone started laughing at Bella and she glared at them all, "Rosalie it's your turn."

"Rubeus Hagrid." She said without hesitating. She seemed proud of the fact. Everyone was about to start laughing when they heard a huge crash.

_**Outside the door (Let's just pretend they couldn't hear the boys)**_

"So what are they talking about again?" Jacob asked Emmett.

"Well at first they were asking Nessie about some stupid book but now they're talking about guys, and could you please not get so close you really smell."

They leaned in to listen some more, Jasper and Edward were also listening.

"Yes, and _**married**_!" They looked at each other.

"What?!"

"Sooo, who _**did**_ you have a thing for?" Rosalie asked.

"I can't believe you're asking me this!"

"It was Harry wasn't it?"

"Mum!"

"Oh dear God, please tell me it wasn't Hermione!" Alice was saying in disgust.

"Aunt Alice!"

"Ron?"

"Dean?"

"Neville?"

"Dudley?"

"Will you lot shut u- Dudley, Grandma Esme?" They heard Nessie shudder and Esme giggle, "Anyway if you must know, Malfoy. There I said it!"

The vamps looked at Jacob worriedly, his face was angry and he was breaking the door frame in his fist.

"Who is Malfoy?" He asked low and dangerously.

"No idea." They answered.

"My my can I just say that this is an interesting position to find you all in." Carlisle said from behind them. They all shushed at him and gestured for him to go closer and listen.

"So what about the rest of you, I told you mine now you tell me yours!" Nessie said.

"What's go-"

"They're talking 'bout guys, it'll be Esme's turn soon." Edward explained.

"Fine! Fred." Edward's face froze.

"Erm, dude Esme won't be too happy when she sees her floor, maybe you should put that board back." Emmett said forcing the floor board back into place. They had missed what they'd just said. But they had heard a light bang.

"Rususwumi." Alice's voice came through.

"Sorry what was that Alice, we didn't quite catch it." Jasper's fist was clenched.

"I said Ron Weasley!" Everyone burst out laughing, "OK, Esme what about you?!" Jasper was slowly calming himself down while it was Carlisle's turn to freeze.

"Do I have to tell you?" She pleaded, "You'll only laugh." Carlisle nearly rushed into the living room but the others pulled him back.

"Yes you have to tell us and yes we'll only laugh." Alice said stubbornly.

"Fine, Sirius Black." They started laughing.

"Who the hell is Sirius Black?" Carlisle said calmly looking at Jacob Black.

"I don't know, never heard of him."

"Ha-ha he dies." The room fell silent and the boys looked at each other.

"That was uncalled for Bella, how could you say something like that?" Alice asked seriously.

"Wha, bu- you, I. Huh?" Inside started laughing at Bella and so did outside, "Rosalie it's your turn."

Emmett calmly got up and ran to his room. He was down before she'd said anything and was holding a baseball bat.

"Rubeus Hagrid." She said proudly. Emmett lashed out and hit the closest thing to him. Edward.

The girls rushed to open the door.

"What the hell is going on out here?!" Bella shouted.

"Who the hell are all of these guys?!" Emmett and Jasper shouted at the same time.

"What guys?!" Rosalie, Alice and Nessie yelled.

"The guys you've just been talki-"

"What the bloody hell has happened to my door and floor?!" Esme yelled, causing everyone to shut up in surprise, and in the case of Jacob and Edward, fear.

"So is anyone going to answer me?" Esme asked calmly. Ever heard of the calm before the storm? Enter Esme.

The lads started talking at once.

"It was them!"

"It wasn't me!"

"It was him!"

"You know I wouldn't ever do anything like that!"

"I never did nout."

"Yeah right, you're the one with a baseball bat!"

"Enough." They shut up at once, "Now we were talking about fictional characters from the book Harry Potter-"

"Hold on, you were talking about being in love with a fictional character?" Carlisle interrupted.

"Yes and what's wrong with that?" Carlisle shrugged at his wife, "I'm am going to ask once more, who ruined my door and floor and if I don't get an answer I am taking the girls on a month holiday to Paris. At your expense."

"It was them!" Emmett, Carlisle and Jasper said immediately pointing at Edward and Jacob.

"Thank you, now find a way to fix them and I'll leave your wives to figure out how to punish you." Edward and Jacob groaned.

"So does that mean that you're not leaving?" Carlisle asked going to put an arm around Esme.

"No. That means that I am leaving. Tonight, it serves you right for listening at the door." His face fell.

"Grandma Esme, is it all right if I join you?"

"Of course it is Renesmee, I love having you around." Jacob growled.

"Oh I cannot let my darling daughter go half way across the world without me, count me in." Bella said. Edward clenched his fists.

"Well we might as well make this a proper trip, count me in too. Coming Alice?" Rosalie asked looking at her.

"Certainly, give me the chance to get some more shopping done.

The lads looked extremely angry.

_**Half an hour later**_

"Well we're packed, bye everybody!" Esme shouted. They headed for the two taxis at the bottom of their driveway.

Alice was still beaming even when Edward grabbed her arm,

"So this is what you've been hiding from me!"

**So anyway I was really bored and thought I might as well just write this. I'm not asking for reviews but it would be nice if you told me what you thought.**

**Kathrine x**


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